Object Pokémon are secretly some of the series’ best

Object Pokémon got a bad rap, and have had a tough time shaking it. When Pokémon Black and White ushered in Pokémon’s fifth generation, there was a bit of consternation around the new monster designs. Players argued that some of Unova’s new Pokémon were uninspired, with designers slapping a set of eyes on an ice cream cone or two and calling it a day. While, sure, not every ‘mon can be a 10/10 like Sprigatito or Pikachu, object Pokémon deserve more love. Some of them are really great! And object Pokémon have really been around since the earliest days of the franchise.

Whenever I think of Pokémon designed around everyday objects, I start with Chandelure. It’s the freakin’ best. It’s the final evolution from Litwick, a cable (adorable), and is a dual fire- and ghost-type. Chandelure isn’t just eyes slapped on an object; instead, it plays with the form of a chandelier, turning a stained-glass base into a face with the branching spokes serving as Chandelure’s arms. Its Pokédex entries, like this one from Pokémon White, play into its eerie, frightening aura: “Being consumed in Chandelure’s flame burns up the spirit, leaving the body behind.”

Truth be told, many of the best object Pokémon are great because they’re ghost-types. It’s similar to how garbage Pokémon (not bad Pokémon; literal garbage) explore the ways pollution has affected the natural world — object Pokémon explore what happens when living beings die. Sometimes their spirits possess things and, boom, you got a dope new Pokémon.

Formed by the spirits of people and Pokémon, the killer balloon Drifloon “tugs on the hands of children to steal them away. However, it gets pulled around instead,” according to the Pearl Pokédex. Object Pokémon trying to kill you is actually pretty common. Here’s Sinistcha’s Pokédex entry from Scarlet: “It pretends to be tea, trying to fool people into drinking it so it can drain their life-force. Its ruse is generally unsuccessful.” Unsuccessful — but still frightening!

Am I biased because ghost-types are my favorite, and a possessed teacup and a child-snatching balloon are way cooler than a cloud of gas? Perhaps! But there are some great non-ghost object Pokémon too, like Honedge (a sword!), Stonjourner (Stonehenge!), Carkol (a cart full o’ coal!), and Klefki (an adorable and whimsical collection of keys!).

Of course, not every object Pokémon is a hit. I too think the gear Pokémon Klink and its evolution line are pretty dull. Bronzor is just a mirror. Sandygast is a vaguely menacing pile of sand, its design undercut by the shovel sticking out from its head.

Image: TV Tokyo

You know what else is pretty dull? So many of Generation 1’s designs. Millennial Pokémon fans (me) will often point to the OG Pokémon games as one of the best Gens. Pokémon Red, Blue, and Yellow have several of the all-time best Pocket Monsters, like their starter trio, Eevee and its evolutions, Gyarados, and more.

But Gen 1 also had some wild stinkers, including some of the more boring object Pokémon. Geodude? Dude’s a rock with arms and a face. Magnemite? A ball with magnets attached. Voltorb? A Poké Ball with a face. And that’s to say nothing of how many of Gen 1’s monsters, and Pokémon in general, are just slightly more fanciful versions of real-world animals. If dogs and birds can be Pokémon, why can’t key rings and teapots?

With Gen 10 on the way, I look forward to what object Pokémon it inevitably brings, no matter what the naysayers spout — and no matter if those object Pokémon try to drain my life force. I’ll love them all the same.