Toronto’s Sabrina Jalees has been making Canada laugh as a standup comedian, actor and writer for decades. Now, she’ll be bringing that energy to the new season of Heated Rivalry — as one of the latest additions to the cast — and to new Netflix dark comedy Toxic Moms. Even her meet-cute with her wife, Shauna McCann, can’t help but be a little funny!
How they met
We met at a dive bar in San Francisco at a lesbian party called Brownies For My Bitches. Allegedly they were serving brownies before I got there. I was living in Brooklyn at the time, on the road doing stand up at colleges across the U.S. I looked around and told my friend I was never going to be attracted to anyone. Ever. Again. I took a sip of my magic gin and tonic, and like a genie delivered her — there was Shauna. Dancing by herself. You have to know two things: she’s an incredible dancer and she’s also super hot. My cartoon jaw dropped to the floor, and I spent the rest of the night trying (and failing) to talk to her. Eventually, just before closing time, I handed her my business card (“Stand Up Comic, Actor, Your New Best Friend.” Nerd!) and told her I’d been trying to tell her all night I think she’s super cute. She said she thought I was cute too and kissed me on the cheek and when I tell you it was electric you must know that there was an actual shock. That was over 17 years ago. I think the big takeaway is: drink more gin and tonics.
The first date
The next day we texted, and I immediately called her my wife. She met me after work that night at a bar called Kat Club, and she showed up looking like a whole different other hot lady that I was equally floored by. She bought me a drink. I spilled it on her, sat on her lap and kissed her all night until I had to head to the airport for my 6 a.m. flight.
The relationship
At the beginning she told me she was “a butterfly” and that she was sort of seeing multiple people and enjoying that, so I pretended I was a butterfly too but all the while I was practicing my net-moves, getting my butterfly cage ready. I flew out to San Francisco two weeks later and when I asked if she had any interest in moving to Brooklyn she seemed open to it. What I did next was a dangerous move that I would warn others against but… I listed all her furniture on Craigslist. Just in case she was serious about moving. When she found out and was understandably shook, I was all, “Relax babe, this is in case you want to move… I know at least three people who will pay $200 for the couch.”
The proposal
I was under the impression that proposals were magic tricks and I had designed this elaborate ring reveal that included fishing lines and grape vines. We were in Corfu at my dear pal Mae Martin’s family’s home and I had hid the ring up in the vines, planning to propose in the morning. But a strawberry daiquiri sent Shauna into terrible food poisoning. I spent the day cutting the fishing line and taking the ring off then putting it back on — patience is not my virtue. I put the proposal off for a day while she puked, and then the following morning, when she was able to gingerly walk and stomach a small bite of toast, I brought her out to under the grape vines, lowered the ring, which sat on a bundle of grapes, now hovering in mid-air magically, and said “Tada!” She said, “What is happening?” I said, “Will you marry me?” She said, “Are you serious?” As in: I am still actively between pukes. She said yes and will never not tease me about my timing.
The wedding
We got married 14 years ago in Warren, Vermont, at the Airbnb of an incredible man named David Sellers. We wrote a bunch of Airbnbs asking if we could hold our wedding at their rental and shockingly only one person was open to it: David. He said he wanted to meet us before he decided though. So we drove nine hours to Warren from Williamsburg, Ontario, and had an incredible evening with him. He ended up speaking at our wedding! It was really incredible, just a perfect evening in the woods.
The kids and pets
We have a 13-year-old Frenchie named Cowboy who always looks grumpy unless he’s dehydrated, then he looks thrilled. Our son Wolfie is eight and an incredible DJ and brother to our youngest boy Rowan, who’s two. We met our donor when I took a one hour surf lesson in Mexico; he was my instructor. He’s now married with two kids so our guys have a half sister and brother in Mexico. We’re one big modern, international family, and all our kids know this origin story and are really proud of it.
The secret to success
We’re both aware that we’re works in progress, ourselves and our relationship. We’re proud of what we’ve accomplished and excited to continue getting better, more empathetic, more loving. We laugh a lot. We have a couple’s therapist that we both really like and see our bi-monthly check-ins as romantic maintenance sessions. We keep trying new things together and genuinely get excited about surprising each other.
The future together
In the morning, I’m playing pickleball, and Shauna’s doing yoga and playing with flowers and clothes, and then we’re either exploring a new city or town together or slowly lurking behind one of our sons, stalking them, getting away with following their every move while playing it off like we’re the cool parents with our own lives.